Does the Jerry Falwell Jr and Becki Falwell Sex Scandal Story Illustrate the Warped Desires and Sex Habits of Evangelicals?

An article at the Religion News Service asks the question if the Jerry Falwell Jr and Becki sex story is an extension and part of the evangelical culture. According to sociologist at the University of Nebraska evangelicals can be pretty kinky when it comes to sex. 

“Sex. In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact.

Marlene Dietrich

Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.

Titus 2:2 NIV

Betty Bowers mocks and jokes about evangelicals and sex. 

Chalk this post up for one that I thought I would never write in the history of this blog. The issue of sexual habits of evangelicals. At the Religion News Service they had an interesting article that deals with the sex scandal involving Jerry Falwell Jr and Becki that has unfolded the last couple of weeks. The article looks at evangelical culture and sex habits of claimed born again Christians. Its deals with alleged alternative sexual practices and the struggles of a strict moral code or marriage. The article is written by University of Nebraska professor Kelsy Burke who does sociology and writes about religion. The take away from the article? Evangelicals can be kinky. The question to ask is it the overtly strongly conservative culture creates those challenges and if it leads to problems for many professing evangelical Christians. Does evangelicalism set up people for failure? Is the Jerry Falwell Jr and Becki Falwell pool boy storm an extension of evangelical culture even if taboo? You can read more in, “Shocked at Falwell claims? Christian websites reveal evangelicals’ adventurous sex culture.”

 

7 thoughts on “Does the Jerry Falwell Jr and Becki Falwell Sex Scandal Story Illustrate the Warped Desires and Sex Habits of Evangelicals?

  1. Obviously, yes, it is a part of evangelical culture. And an even greater part of American culture. What makes Evangelicals different is professing to not approve of it. But not all that different. Not as different as the Bible calls us to be.

    If you want to see America mentioned in the Bible, read Revelation chapter 17.

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    • If you want to see America mentioned in the Bible, read Revelation chapter 17.

      Straight out of Hal Lindsay and every Cutlure War Preacher who gets off on the thought of God raining Death and Destruction down on All My Enemies.

      I was one of the red shirts on the receiving end of Revelation for a couple years. The damage is still there.

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      • Straight out of Hal Lindsay and every Cutlure War Preacher who gets off on the thought of God raining Death and Destruction down on All My Enemies.

        In this case, on all my friends and family. And probably myself; premillennialism is wishful thinking.

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  2. Something I noticed about the linked article.

    A lot of it had to do with the Christian husband’s “special preferences” (i.e. Kink, what Christians used to call “perversions”) and making the Christian Wifey “come around to it”.

    Michael & Debi Pearl’s honeymoon, as described by Patriarch Pearl. It was like he had My Honeymoon planned out in detail in advance and kept rushing his bride through that Perfect Honeymoon Checklist. Like this was His Big Fantasy Finally Coming True and she was just the necessary piece of equipment for My Homeymoon. Like a lesser degree of those True Crime stories about serial killers/serial rapists who force their victims through their pre-scripted sexual fantasy, some even to the point of having an actual script with dialogue.

    And being a guy, I have long believed that Christianese Purity Culture sets the guy up for some real problems. He’s basically growing up asexual and celibate, kept a virgin by promises of Swinging from the Chandeliers Barn-Burning Married S*E*X starting the night after saying “I Do”. And growing up learning about sex from “other sources” (like locker-room brags or The Internet). This sounds like a recipe for Secret Sexual Fantasy growing without any reality check, resulting in Paraphilae (Kink). If he’s not allowed to get aroused in the normal way, he’ll start making connections between arousal and whatever other stimuli are available, i.e. a Paraphilia or Kink.

    He’s coming into marriage expecting to make up for lost time (with a lot of sexual-fantasy baggage) with his bride as the required piece of equipment. A bride whose Christianese Purity Culture upbringing requires her to morph instantly from Virgin Unto Death to hubby’s Personal Porn Star servicing all his pent-up fantasies and expectations starting that first night. These are not realistic expectations for either him or her.

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    • Addendum:

      And a lot of these Christianese “Special Preferences”… Let’s just say the only other context I’ve heard of them has been PORNOGRAPHY. (30 years in Furry Fandom and you get exposed to a LOT of the real thing, including the ridiculous.)

      Like Chuckles Mahaney forcing himself on his pregnant Wifey while she’s puking from morning sickness. (HUMBLY, of course.) Where do you find the trope that the Woman must always be ready and eager to service the Man whenever he gets those Urrges in his Arreas? No Matter What? Porn.

      Like Douggie ESQUIRE of Vision Forum giving his Commander’s Handmaid “semen showers”. Not only does this provide Plausible Deniability (“I did not Know her in the Biblical Sense”), but where do you find that act? Only place I’d ever heard of it was in Porn, where it not only shows the Man’s Mastery over the Woman, but displays his Manly volume of Precious Bodily Fluid for the camera (and audience).

      And Jerry Falwell Jr? What he did was the original definition of “Cuck”, a term which originated where? Porn. Junior bragging that his dick was so big Wifey couldn’t handle it? That sounds like a brag from a porn character; makes you wonder just where he was finding an orifice big enough to fit His Manly Manhood. And Wifey was going Cougar Attack on college-age students? Where do women act like that? Porn.

      And then there’s “Christian Domestic Discipline”, i.e. Wife Spanking. (“PAPA SPANK!”)… This was THE kink of Victorian Gentlemen, under the term “erotic flagellation”. “KINK OF ENGLAND!” And a favorite subject of Victorian Porn. To the point someone actually traced a lot of Christian Child-Spanking manuals as sourced from Victorian Erotic Flagellation; you see, Victorians were very indirect with their printed Porn, so Christians of a century later (in a time where everything was In-Your-Face Direct) probably would not have recognized it as Porn.

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      • Let’s just say the only other context I’ve heard of them has been PORNOGRAPHY.

        Is that capitalized to be shocking? Everybody looks at pornography now. Well, nearly everybody under age 30. Boys get their first cell phone at age 10 and it’s wank city. Girls think they have to send naked selfies to be popular. Sex addiction used to be stereotyped as a guy thing but it’s an equal opportunity world now. And like any addiction, over time a person has to increase the intensity in order to get the same dopamine hit. I recently heard a preacher say that the porn he grew up with would be considered racy lingerie ads compared to what’s on google image search today. Yes, all of these various perversions that we hear about fallen leaders doing have their origins in pornography.

        And being a guy, I have long believed that Christianese Purity Culture sets the guy up for some real problems. He’s basically growing up asexual and celibate, kept a virgin by promises of Swinging from the Chandeliers Barn-Burning Married S*E*X starting the night after saying “I Do”. And growing up learning about sex from “other sources” (like locker-room brags or The Internet). This sounds like a recipe for Secret Sexual Fantasy growing without any reality check, resulting in Paraphilae (Kink). If he’s not allowed to get aroused in the normal way, he’ll start making connections between arousal and whatever other stimuli are available, i.e. a Paraphilia or Kink.

        The problem isn’t that purity culture doesn’t allow people to get aroused in the normal way, the problem is that pornography is a super-stimulus that completely overwhelms the normal way. Use porn for long enough (and it’s not very long) and normal humans don’t satisfy any more. The problem is much bigger than evangelicalism.

        Maybe the biggest problem with purity culture is that it does an insufficient job of protecting young people from pornography and its effects. Partly that’s because evangelicalism is inherently conservative, and science didn’t know how much porn affects the brain until the last few decades. Partly that’s because half of Christian leaders are addicted and are in no position to bring freedom and restoration to the people they minister to.

        What purity culture / the church needs is not to relax what kinds of sexual behaviors it approves of, but an extra big helping of grace, love and truth. It needs to understand the problems posed by pornography and sex addiction. It needs to show grace and forgiveness to people who are already ensnared. And it needs to show love to people so they don’t need their addiction to compensate for their hurts and hang-ups.

        with his bride as the required piece of equipment

        This is typical of young men. Selfishness and self-centeredness. It took me years to learn to love my bride like Christ loves the church, and I still fall short.

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